Survivor’s guilt

You had one job! An internet memeParents are supposed to keep bad things from happening to their kids. That's the rule and everybody knows it. If something terrible happens to a child, our first thought is often, Where were the parents?, not, There, but for the grace of God, go I.If you've ... Continue reading

Those who mourn

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. — Matthew 5:4 (NIV)In my previous post, I talked about how it might be possible to be grateful in the midst of grief. I don't want to imply that I'm not heartsick about my son's death. I'm trying to hold two true but seemingly ... Continue reading

Can I be thankful?

While most of America celebrates Thanksgiving, my calendar will mark the fifth week since my son committed suicide. What do I have to be thankful about?Last Thanksgiving, I was thankful that my beloved son had survived one more year with his crippling depression. He'd lost his job, yet ... Continue reading

Unplanned destinations

"You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people." —Genesis 50:20 (NLT)Joseph was the first human to be ghosted. His brothers didn't like him, so they sold him to slave traders, told their father, Jacob, he'd ... Continue reading

Finding joy

“It is hard to talk about joy. … When my leg hurts I can talk about it. I have a lot of words to describe how much it hurts. When it doesn’t hurt I don’t think about it. When I am well I don’t talk about it. My language is limited. My language is much more elaborate for anxiety than for joy.” – ... Continue reading

When suicide sat down to dinner

“After you were born, your mother told me: 'We're just here to be memories for our kids.'”Cooper saying goodbye to Murphy in the movie InterstellarI barely remember my father, and what “memories” I have might be manufactured, for all that I know. I suspect most of them are just impressions ... Continue reading

Gravity

In Alfonso Cuarón’s beautiful film, Gravity, Sandra Bullock is part of a team of US space shuttle astronauts on a mission to repair the Hubble space telescope. As Dr. Ryan Stone, Bullock feels lost on earth, weighed down by grief, loneliness, and gravity. She spends her nights driving aimlessly, ... Continue reading

Un-rejected

“Didn't you ever read this in the Scriptures? 'The stone that the builders rejected has now become the cornerstone.’” — Mark 12:10 (NLT)He was despised and rejected—a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief. We turned our backs on Him and looked the other way. He was despised, and we did ... Continue reading